


So Much for our Happy Ending // Kenma X Kuroo

by clockwork_writes



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Canonical Character Death, Character Death, Death, Depressing, Falling In Love, Illnesses, Love, M/M, Major Illness, Manga & Anime, Not Canon Compliant, Red String of Fate, Romance, Sad, Soulmates, Terminal Illnesses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:41:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 15,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27452164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clockwork_writes/pseuds/clockwork_writes
Summary: In another life, another world, Kenma and Kuroo are soulmates; destined to meet but their lives aren't what they'd hoped for.  Enjoying the time they have together, they try to enjoy what they can without thinking too much about what's to come.~I ALSO POST ON WATTPAD~~ I ALSO POST ON FANFICTION.NET~If you are sensitive, this may not be the story for you:DeathIllnessSoulmatesAngst
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1   
It is said that no matter how many times you and your soulmate part, you are always destined to meet in another life. This was a theory that Kenma thought was absurd. Thought it would be enjoyable, life was not like a video game in his eyes; at least it wasn’t when it came to soulmates. The idea of having someone with whom you were destined to meet made Kenma uneasy. With the apparition of his red string just around the corner, the eve of his eighteenth birthday was bound to be stressful. The thought of having a string attached to his pinky, simply not any string; a string that could stretch, tangle but never breaks. The most unnerving thing was that the string led to someone that Kenma was bound to meet one day. 

How old would he be when he met this so-called soulmate? What would it be like? Was it really that important? What if his soulmate wasn’t what he expected? Many thoughts swarmed Kenma’s mind. It was difficult for him not to overanalyze the possibilities. 

Kenma’s parents had discussed the topic of soulmates with the boy at a young age; his parents had explained the concept and how it worked. They had even stated that they were soulmates. Their relationship had always picked Kenma’s curiosity, though he understood what a soulmate was, his parents seemed to go beyond that of how it was explained. They knew every little detail of each other, their hearts seemed to be laced together; they were one. Through his doubts, Kenma’s parents gave him hope. He did not understand but he hoped to have something half as amazing as his parents’ relationship. They seemed to fit together like two puzzle pieces; their smiles glowed when in the presence of each other. Though he’d never voice it, Kenma longed for something as wonderful. 

The time had come, five minutes remained till October sixteenth, Kenma’s birthday. His mind contemplated the many possibilities: What if it didn’t show up? Would it hurt? Would his soulmate feel it too? Would he have to wait till his soulmate was eighteen? Did his soulmate already have the string visible to their eye? 

The boy pushed the thoughts away from his mind as he looked at the time on his phone. His hands shook as he held them on his knees. Sweat formed as the boy continued to fix the clock. The minutes seemed to be going slower than normal; he wondered what he was so nervous about. It was simply a string on his finger. It wasn’t like he was the only one going through this. Everyone had a soulmate; everyone had a red string. 

As the last few seconds slipped away, Kenma took a deep breath. His body stiffened as he felt a thin pressure being applied to his right pinky. Though he tried not to, Kenma looked down to see the red string slowly materializing into something clear. A string the girth of a simple strand of yarn was now attached to his finger. 

The dyed blond reached his hand down and attempted to touch it. To his surprise, it felt it almost felt like a real string. The weight was existent, he could play with it. He’d never bothered to read up on it but it surprised him just how real it felt. There was an odd warmth that he wasn’t expecting. It was comforting; comforting enough for Kenma to give a faint smile. 

The bright red colour was a little unsettling to the eye. Though the vibrancy slowly started to fade as did the tingling of the string being formed. Kenma let out a deep breath that he’d been holding. It was finally over, the wait for this was over; the stress was gone. Well, the stress of this was gone. More lied ahead 

+++

Simply a few moments before, as the string was being formed on Kenma’s hand, Kuroo’s string grew to have a brighter colour. At the final moment, the string gave a gentle tug on his hand and a light squeeze on his finger. He’d remembered when Bokuto had told him that this would happen when your soulmate can finally see their string. Kuroo had hoped that his soulmate was younger, allowing him to feel this. 

The string now provided a gentle warmth, something new to Kuroo. In the past year, it had been different, a simple weight on his finger; it was a gentle weight but it was still there. The dark-haired boy smiled down at his hand. His body felt warmer, instantly giving him the comfort he hoped his soulmate felt as well. 

He smiled down at his hand, still holding his pencil and smiled. The thought that he now knew his soulmate’s birthday made him happy. This was a date he needed to remember. The boy engraved the date into his mind: October sixteenth was his soulmate’s birthday. The first of many things he was determined to learn.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2  
Kenma’s chest rose and fell with every struggled breath. His oxygen tank merely a foot away, a long clear tube connected the green tank to his nose, preceding to wrap along the top of his ears. He hated it but he needed it. He despised the attention that it drew. People gawked at him, sympathetic looks were shot from afar. One woman even offered him money on the bus once. He’d been slightly uneasy when this happened. Thankfully, Akashi had been there to tell them that it wasn’t needed. 

Kenma was unsure about many things, things such as soulmates but one thing that he was sure of was his pure hatred of not blending in. He much preferred to be in the corner playing games than having to socialize with other people. His games were enough company. Blending in was something that he’d grown to master until he got this tank. 

Today, Kenma’s mother made him take a walk. Not far from his house was a small park lined with beautiful pink cherry blossom trees. His mother required that he spend a small amount of time outside away from games. At first, he’d intended to simply practice setting against the wall but his mother stated that it was a dreadful thing to do. She believed that it was critically unhealthy for his mental health. 

Kenma knew that she was right but holding that ball reminded him of what he was, how capable his lungs used to be. It reminded him of a time worth living for. He’d remembered setting for Hinata during training camps. Though he rarely voiced it, he knew he was good. He missed being something, something other than the sick kid. 

Even though his friends tried to hide it, they saw him as the sick kid. After the cancer developed, he knew that the others saw him as weak. Akashi offered to stay in and play games, something he’d never done before. Akashi was far from a gamer. 

Hinata suddenly dialled down his energy around Kenma. His normal bouncy self was covered up by calm reactions. He stopped asking Kenma to set for him. Seeing Hinata was hard enough as it was being so far away but this seemed further. It was not a distance type of far, it was a far like he’d been distant. Kenma hated that Hinata slacked off around him. 

The last time the boys had seen each other, Hinata had asked Lev to join along. At first, Hinata only meant well but it made the afternoon bittersweet. Kenma had little to no patience when it came to Lev. The three boys had gone to the park. They’d attempted to play volleyball but they pitied Kenma too much to continue. He hated being the sick kid. His mind could not comprehend why the universe would do this. 

The weather was nice, Kenma hadn’t needed a scarf. Though he’d graduated, he still wore his Nekoma Volleyball club jacket with pride. It was one of the only things that reminded him that he used to be something. The heart of the problem was that he never managed to accept that he was sick. 

The string on Kenma’s singer suddenly started pulsing, heat overwhelmed his hand. The glow of the string grew brighter and brighter with every step. The pulsing caught Kenma’s attention. His pace increased as he followed the string. Every step brought him a brighter glow. His breathing increased, each breath a little harder to take. Despite this, he still took longer strides, his legs moving faster till he saw it. The glow of the string led him to his soulmate. 

To his surprise, it was a tall boy, his hair was a mess of black locks, his muscles were prominent. His back was an impressive size. Kenma had yet to see the boy’s face. It seemed to be one of the most stressful moments of his life. He’d never imagined this moment. What if he didn’t like what he saw? What if he was disappointed? What if the tank was a deal-breaker? Kenma knew that no one wanted to be with the sick guy. 

As the dark-haired boy finally made his body turn, it felt like an eternity. Kenma had felt like he’d never waited for something for longer. 

As Kuroo talked with Bokuto, an odd pulsing started to tickle his pinky. Glancing down at his hand, he saw the pulsing string. His eyes followed the red attachment from his finger to the boy standing but a few yards away. 

There he was, his soulmate. The dark-haired boy eyed his soulmate from head to toe, completely overlooking the oxygen tank. The boy’s frame was small, his dyed blond hair draped over his face leaving only the roots, a dark brown colour. Kuroo could not believe his eyes, he’d finally seen his soulmate. His eyes glanced down at his hand before looking back up; locking eyes with the blond. 

Kenma’s face heated as he made eye contact. Socializing was never easy for Kenma. This was one of those things that he wanted to ignore but simply couldn’t. The truth was that he was terrified at that moment. Even if he’d wanted to leave, his body wasn’t moving. What if his soulmate didn’t like him? 

Bokuto gave Kuroo a confused look before asking, “Is umm everything okay?” Bokuto eyed the situation, eyes glancing back and forth from Kenma to Kuroo. 

“Everything is great, I think I just met my soulmate,” the dark-haired boy slowly made his way over to his soulmate after handing Bokuto the volley-ball that he was previously holding. With every step that Kuroo took, both boys felt their emotions bubble. This wasn’t just meeting anyone, it was meeting your soulmate, the person you were meant to be with, the person that your soul was attached to. If the stories were true, both boys had met in their previous lives. 

Kenma’s heart raced as Kuroo made his final step towards him. There they were, face to face. Kenma glanced up, allowing his eyes to lock with Kuroo’s. For a moment, they stood there in complete silence, as if Kuroo already knew that conversation didn’t come easy to Kenma. Kuroo was quite a bit taller than Kenma. 

“So you’re my soulmate?” Kuroo asked, with a smile, breaking the silence between them. He rubbed the back of his neck, without removing his eyes from Kenma. 

“I guess so… I’m sorry,” a confused look came upon the taller boy’s face. He wondered why Kenma had been apologizing. 

“Why are you apologizing? You have nothing to say sorry for. This is great! I’m Kuroo Tetsurou!” Excitement radiated in his voice. Kenma, on the other hand, felt intimidated. 

“I’m um Kenma Kozume,” his small voice spoke loud enough for only the two to hear. There was a comfortable silence between the two. 

“Do you like Volleyball?” The dark haired boy glanced back at his friend. As Kuroo looked back at Kenma, Kenma gave a small nod. “OH! What position!?” Kuroo’s eyes lit up, his smile brightening his entire face. 

“Setter…” Kenma’s voice was but a whisper. His answer only caused Kuroo to smile wider. 

“We really are meant for each other,” Kuroo gave a cocky grin, “I’m a spiker,” He glanced back at Bokuto. “Wanna play with us? We could use a setter. We’ve just been passing the ball around,” Kuroo knew not how much that meant to Kenma. Kenma felt a certain joy he hadn’t felt in a while. 

“That sounds nice,” Kenma let himself give way to a small smile. He hadn’t smiled in a long time. Kuroo didn’t look at him and see a kid with a tank, Kuroo saw him as a person; that person being his soulmate. 

As the boys progressed in their game, Kenma’s energy grew weaker and his breaths harder to control. Breathing quickly became a task. Not wanting to end so soon, Kenma tried to hide his struggles. Despite his current problem, this was one of the first moments he’d felt like his old self, he felt like he mattered. Feeling the ball touch his fingertips, even just for a split second, Kenma felt more alive than he had in years.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3  
Kenma’s heart broke as breathing became more difficult. His fingers touched the ball one last time, allowing him to set for Bokuto; Kenma then let his body gently fall. The blond sat on the ground trying to catch his breath. His chest tightened around his lungs, making everything seem harder. A weight pressed down, as though a child were sitting on him. Kuroo’s eyes widened, a look of worry washed away the bright smile he was holding. 

Kenma was no stranger to this sensation, he just allowed himself to do what the nurses had told him to: breath slowly, try to take more in bit by bit. A rhythm formed each time he did this. It was like a character regaining health in a video game. Nothing different. He just needed a potion; in this case, more air. Kenma looked up as he felt a warm hand place itself on his shoulder. His eyes locked with Kuroo’s hazel ones. Kuroo’s presence added an odd comfort. 

“Are you okay? Do you need something?” Kuroo’s voice was dripping with worry, it came as a surprise to Kenma that this boy, this boy he’d met today seemed to care more than people he met years ago. The string, wound tightly around Kenma’s finger, pulsed. 

“Just tired,” Kenma gave a faint, fake smile. He knew that he wasn’t just tired, he was dying, okay maybe not at that moment but he knew that eventually, he’d be gone. 

“Maybe we should stop for today. Why don’t I walk you home? Bokuto is supposed to meet a friend. I’m sure he won’t mind,” Kuroo gave his soulmate a kind smile. The dark haired boy glanced back at his owl haired friend only to see him still excited about his perfect spike.   
“No need, I think I can manage. I don’t live far,” Kenma knew that he’d be taking Kuroo away from his friend if he were to ask him to come with him. Though Kenma was intrigued by his soulmate, he didn’t want to impose. 

“Nonsense, I’m sure Bokuto won’t mind, right Kōtarō?” Kuroo glanced back at his friend, who wore a confused expression, a look of annoyance crept onto Kuroo’s face. “Kōtarō, do you mind meeting your friend alone? I’m going to walk Kozume home.” Bokuto gave a nod. 

“Hey! YES! It’s okay! Have fun you two! Nice meeting you Kozume!” Bokuto looked overjoyed. Bokuto knew how long Kuroo had wanted to meet his soulmate, it’s all he’d talk about when his string first developed. It was something that Bokuto knew he didn’t want to get in the way of. 

“You both don’t have to call me Kozume, Kenma is just fine. And really, Kuroo, you don’t have to walk me home,” Kenma knew that this was a losing battle. He just felt it, he felt that Kuroo wouldn’t quit it. The one hope Kenma held onto was that his parents had chosen to leave the house. 

“I don’t have to but I want to. I’m coming with you. Besides, we’re soulmates shouldn’t we get to know each other?” Kenma was defeated. He’d expected a quiet walk to the park and back home. He was happy with this discovery though it was a little much for his mind to take. Meeting his soulmate was something he’d overthought for hours and hours on end. The boy kneeling in front of him was his soulmate, his mind couldn’t quite grasp that this was his soulmate. 

Kuroo stood up, extending a hand for Kenma to grab. Kenma extended a hand to grab Kuroo’s. Their fingers touched, sending a spark through both their hands. There was an unfamiliar yet familiar comfort in their touch. Kuroo gave a rapid yank on Kenma’s arm allowing him to get up faster. The tug was harder than expected, forcing Kenma to crash into Kuroo’s chest. Kenma quickly pulled away, a light blush forming on both boys’ cheeks. Kenma gently pulled his hand away to grasp the tank at his side. The cold metal handle sent a chill up the blond’s spine. 

As the two boys walked away from the park, there was a comfortable silence between the two. Both boys’ minds burned with questions they wanted to ask each other, Kenma was too shy to break the silence and Kuroo didn’t want to seem too forceful. Though they were both nervous, Kuroo took it upon himself to break the silence. 

“So tell me about yourself? What do you like?” The dark haired boy was curious to know. He’d wondered for months; he’d wondered what his soulmate’s favourite colour was, what their favourite sport was, what their birthday was, what made them laugh, what made them smile, what could possibly make them sad, what left them speechless. Kuroo wanted to know everything about Kenma but for now, he’d be content with this one answer. 

“I like games… like video games,” Kenma’s voice was gentle. The sound of the plastic wheels rolling on the pavement almost drowned out his voice. The question had not taken Kenma by surprise, it was often a conversation starter. 

“You like volleyball, you play setter, you love games and your birthday is October sixteenth, anything else I should know?” Kuroo was content with what he knew for today but he somehow wanted more. It was eating at him, wanting to know. 

“I’m not the best at conversation… small talk is not my thing,” Kenma’s words gave Kuroo a twinge of disappointment yet he was unable to stop wanting to know more. His mind wanted to study Kenma. He wanted to know Kenma, better than he knew himself. 

“That’s okay, I can lead,” Kuroo flashed the blond an award winning smile. Kenma would be lying if he said that Kuroo’s smile wasn’t the brightest thing he’d ever seen. “I am a spiker as you already know, I like chemistry and food, my birthday is November seventeenth, I really like red, I enjoy conversation and I like your eyes,” the last statement caught Kenma by surprise. He wasn’t expecting Kuroo to flirt with him so soon. Kuroo was more straightforward than Kenma had expected. Kenma just knew that his cheeks were a crimson colour by now. 

“I umm..th-thank you I umm…” Kuroo had achieved what he wanted, he wanted to see a flustered Kenma. 

“Awn, it’s cute when you’re flustered,” Kuroo glanced down to see Kenma had stopped walking. Holding his cheeks, Kenma looked away from the taller boy. “I’m sorry, I tend to be too forward. I’ll hold back,” Kuroo was a little worried about pushing Kenma away. He just couldn’t help wanting to know; he wanted to see Kenma’s every reaction. He wanted to eventually love everything about Kenma. 

“No, it's okay…” Kenma allowed himself to uncover his face, bringing his eyes up to lock with Kuroo’s. The two boys simply looked at each other in silence. It was new to both of them. They knew that it would work out eventually.   
As the boys arrived at Kenma’s home, they both stopped. Kuroo’s eyes scanned the place. It was a nice modern place, it wasn’t far from the private school Kuroo was supposed to attend, Nekoma was the name? 

“Can I have your number? I wouldn’t want this to end here,” Kuroo gave an embarrassed smile. It was true that Kenma didn’t want this to end here. Kenma extended a hand signaling Kuroo to hand his phone over. The blond carefully entered the ten digits. He handed back the phone, as Kuroo saw the blank contact name, he typed in ‘Soulmate’. A Cocky smile decorated his face as he glanced back at Kenma. Kenma couldn’t get enough of that smile. Both boys didn’t quite understand how to explain. It was as though their emotions were clear as day but clouded. They felt as though they’d known each other forever yet they knew nothing about each other. 

“I guess I’ll see you soon?” Kenma questioned as he closed the gate. There was something about Kuroo that made him want to know more. For the first time in a long time, Kenma wanted to be close to someone. He didn’t understand how or why but he knew that he needed what was to come. There was something about Kuroo that just felt right. 

“I’ll text you,” Kuroo gave him a wink and allowed himself to walk away. Both boys’ minds were clouded with thoughts. They had many questions but they were both sure about one thing; they were happy.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4  
Kenma entered the house, only to be greeted by his mother. Her dark hair was wound tightly into a bun. She has soft features, her once young face now showed signs of age. She was beautiful despite all this. Not a gray hair hung from her head. She watched her son walk through the door but before he could escape, she questioned him. 

“Who was that?” Her question was exactly what Kenma wanted to avoid. He detested drawing attention to himself. This was his mother though, she had a knack for wanting to know everything. 

“A guy I met at the park,” Kenma tried to cut the conversation short as he felt his cheeks heating. He really didn’t want to talk about the boy he’d met at the park with his mother but he also wanted to. A small part of him wanted to shout that he’d met his soulmate; he didn’t like that part of himself. 

His mother raised a brow as she continued to cut the vegetables. Kenma assumed she’d bought them at the market yesterday. It was common for her to go to the Saturday markets. He knew that she’d want more information and if he were to avoid telling her now, she’d nag more. Kenma loved his mother but sometimes he wondered how she’d birthed him; they were so different. 

“Take a seat,” the dark haired woman pointed her knife at the chair and placed her hand on her hip. Kenma knew he was going to get it, he knew that he was going to have to answer every single one of her questions. Kenma did as he was told; he wasn’t in the mood to argue. “Name?” and it started. Kenma could only thank his lucky stars that his father wasn’t home. This was embarrassing enough. 

“Kuroo Tetsurou,” Kenma’s tone was far from excited despite how saying Kuroo’s name made him feel. He knew that he was blushing. He’d be lying if he were to say that Kuroo wasn’t attractive but there was something different about him. 

“Age?” His mother’s questions were so specific. He didn’t even know how old Kuroo was. The topic never came up. 

“He never mentioned it,” Kenma knew what her questions were leading up to. 

“I saw he had a ball, did you guys play?” Kenma simply nodded in response. “So he liked volley-ball, must be a nice change to play with someone else. You didn’t push yourself too much?” Despite everything, Kenma’s mother spent her days and nights worrying. Kenma didn’t know but she often sat on the floor beside his bedroom door, listening to make sure he didn’t stop breathing. It weighed heavy on her mind; cancer was a deep fear of hers. Her grandfather had died of cancer when she was a child. She wouldn’t have wished it on her worst enemy but she was tortured by it once more, this time being her son. Her heart ached every time she had to take him to the hospital whether it be for an appointment or a relapse. 

“We just played a bit. I stopped when I got tired,” Kenma didn’t look at his mother, his eyes remained fixed on her hands. 

“So, you’re 18 now… was he your… your soulmate?” This was a question that his mother was hesitant to ask. She knew that this was a touchy subject for Kenma. As a child, though Kenma may not remember, he’d always thought it was something unimportant to him. She thought that he might have no interest in waiting to meet them. 

Kenma felt his cheeks heat, he didn’t understand why this was flustering him. Yeah, Kuroo was his soulmate but it wasn’t more than that. They’d just met that day. Kenma simply nodded his head, still not looking up at his mother. He appreciated his mother’s concern but for the most part, he wanted to keep it to himself. There was a small part of him that was happy to say it. He’d finally met someone with whom he was supposed to connect. 

Kenma’s mother put down the knife and walked towards him. Kenma felt his mother’s hand on his shoulder, making him look up at her. Her eyes were soft and full of love.   
“Sweetheart, please don’t overthink it,” his mother knew him all too well. Though she left it simple, she knew how much he’d overthink. She’d always said that if he’d spend half the amount of time sleeping as he would overthinking, he’d have a proper sleep schedule.

Kenma’s mother pulled him into a hug. She was always warm and comforting. A mother’s hug is something a child is never too old for. The truth was that Kenma was overthinking; he felt guilty for being sick. He felt wrong for putting Kuroo through that. He didn’t want Kuroo to be the guy who’s soulmate died before they even made it to thirty.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a lot of texting. Next update coming soon.

Chapter 5  
Kuroo’s thumb slid across the screen as he scrolled through Instagram. With a ping, Kuroo was notified that Bokuto texted him. 

[Bokuto]: Guess what!!  
[Bokuto]: Wait no!!  
[Bokuto]: I’ll tell you!   
[Bokuto]: I met my soulmate! 

That’s great! Tell me all about it: [Kuroo] 

[Bokuto]: He’s great! He likes volleyball!  
[Bokuto]: He’s pretty cute too!  
[Bokuto]: He’s pretty quiet but we hit it off!  
[Bokuto]: Speaking of soulmates, have you texted Kenma?

I haven’t, I don’t want to scare him away too soon: [Kuroo]  
He’s pretty shy.:[Kuroo]  
I mean it’s not a bad thing, it’s pretty cute: [Kuroo]

[Bokuto]: Text him. It’s been 3 days.   
[Bokuto]: Listen to your amazing friend for he knows all.   
[Bokuto]: You know I’m right. 

Kuroo did that exactly, he texted Kenma but he didn’t know what to say. 

Hey, it’s Kuroo :) : [Kuroo]

[Soulmate] (Kenma): Hey

What’s up?:[Kuroo]

[Soulmate] (Kenma): I just finished a game.

Oh, I hope I’m not a bother. I can go if you’re busy.: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): No, it’s okay.  
[Soulmate](Kenma): I was just finishing up.

Well, if you’re free, we could play our own game:[Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): Sure  
[Soulmate](Kenma): What is it?

21 questions: [Kuroo]  
I want to get to know you: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): Umm.. okay I guess. 

I’ll start: [Kuroo]  
Favourite colour?:[Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): I really like blue.   
[Soulmate](Kenma): What’s your fav food?

I really like grilled salted mackerel pike.:[Kuroo]  
What about you?:[Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): Apple pie.  
[Soulmate](Kenma): Favourite season?

Spring is really beautiful.: [Kuroo]  
Are you in university?: [Kuroo]

This was a question that pained Kenma. He wanted to go but the doctors said it was best to keep him home. 

[Soulmate](Kenma): I was for a while but when my lungs got bad,  
I had to drop out.

I’m sorry I brought it up: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): No, it’s okay.   
[Soulmate](Kenma): I accepted that I couldn’t.   
[Soulmate](Kenma): I did half a semester of business and administration.  
[Soulmate](Kenma): It was fun for the most part. 

Any reason you wanted to take that?: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): I wanted to own my own company.   
[Soulmate](Kenma): I wanted to start a video game company. 

Wow!! That’s great!: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): What about you, what are you taking?

In my first semester, I took Natural sciences: [Kuroo]  
But I realized that I wanted to work in sports: [Kuroo]  
I am currently taking social sciences: [Kuroo]  
I’m hoping to work in sports all over japan, maybe with kids: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): That sounds great.

Tell me if I’m being too forward: [Kuroo]  
But would you like to meet up?: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): That sounds nice.   
[Soulmate](Kenma): I’m pretty much free whenever.   
[Soulmate](Kenma): Other than when I have appointments.   
[Soulmate](Kenma): Just pick a date and I’ll tell you if I can. 

Really?: [Kuroo]  
I’m not being too much?: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): No, I’d be happy to meet up. 

In reality, Kenma was shaking. He was unsure of what he’d just agreed to. This was something big. Did he really have no inhibition around Kuroo? He just felt like it was right.

Listen, I’d love to keep texting but I have a class in 10:[Kuroo]  
I’ll text you later: [Kuroo]  
Is that okay?: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): I’d like that.   
[Soulmate](Kenma): Talk later. 

Kenma allowed himself to drop his phone on the bed. Placing both hands on his face, Kenma smiled into his hands. His emotions were all over the place; he could only describe how he felt as a flutter. He could only feel happiness. Kuroo was something else, he was a wonderful escape. Kuroo made Kenma feel like something different; he didn’t feel like the cancer guy with Kuroo and that made him happy. It made him feel alive again like he felt on court in the middle of a game.


	6. Chapter 6

Kuroo turned his head, the red digits on the clock announced that it was one thirty in the morning. His head shifted back, allowing him to look at his textbooks once more. Eight hours, he’d been sitting at his desk for eight hours. He’d been scanning the same three pages for the past forty five minutes. Though he always passed, Kuroo always assumed he’d fail. Currently, his mind kept reciting “Chem is going to kick my ass tomorrow,” he knew deep down that he’d pass but something always held him back from believing in himself fully.   
Kuroo allowed himself to close the textbook for the night. He’d recited the periodic table six times in the last hour, he’d listened to the song three times, he reread the entire chapter twice that day and he’d answered all the practice questions. This was a bad habit of his, Kuroo often dove head first into his books and obsessed over getting a good grade. This fact had often been overlooked in his earlier years; people would just call him smart. It became a concern to his parents when he started studying in the summers; he said he’d been preparing himself for the coming year. To Kuroo, studying was a distraction, something that needed his full, undivided attention. 

Kuroo lazily made his way to his bed. His body hit the mattress and his head, the pillow. His phone was screen down on his nightstand. His mind wondered if Kenma was awake at an hour like this. Would it be too much for him to text him at this hour? He had said earlier that day that he would text him. Kuroo decided to ignore the possibility of being too much. 

Hey, you up? Sorry it’s so late. I got caught up studying.: [Kuroo]

Unfortunately for Kuroo, Kenma had shut off his phone merely ten minutes before. Kenma’s mother had become more strict about bedtime since he’d gotten sick. Despite his being 18, his mother was babying him more than she did when he was twelve. 

Kenma was far from asleep, he lay awake, staring at the ceiling. Kenma’s hand rested on his chest; his hand feeling his beating heart through the many layers. He counted forty seven… forty eight… forty nine… fifty. He wondered if Kuroo was awake now. He knew that logically, Kuroo was probably asleep. Kenma wondered how class went for Kuroo. Maybe he got a lot of homework or it was a really bad class. 

Kenma thought back to when he was in college. This one class was dreadful. The teacher had repeatedly singled him out to answer questions. Though it was an exaggeration, Kenma felt like the teacher was only picking on him. Kenma had hardly been able to answer the questions. All eyes were on him; he felt the same feeling in his stomach as he did in fourth grade when he had to read his story in front of the class. Kenma knew that he had social anxiety. People were too much for him. As the children his age became louder, Kenma became quieter. He became more annoyed with how open people were. As he entered high school, Kenma didn’t understand why others only talked about others. Why did people care who was sleeping with who or who was dating who? He always thought it was irrelevant. Wouldn’t your soulmate be disappointed if you didn’t save yourself for them? 

Kenma hadn’t so much as kissed someone before. Then it dawned on him, had Kuroo ever dated anyone? Had he ever been kissed? Had he slept with anyone? Kenma knew not why these questions came to mind. He never really cared. He just wanted to know. Kenma wondered if he’d been the only person not to have a relationship in high school? 

Kenma shook the thoughts away. It wasn’t something that mattered. So what if he hadn’t kissed anyone. The boy lifted his hand allowing him to observe the red string attached to his finger. It was still unbelievable to Kenma that he had a soulmate. He was attached to Kuroo by this thin thread. Something about it just felt right. Just walking with Kuroo the other day felt right. Kenma’s heart fluttered. He was excited, the other day, playing with Kuroo and Bokuto had given him a rush. It had made him feel alive like in his younger days. He felt like himself again. 

+++

The next morning, Kenma opened his phone to a message from Kuroo. A sting of guilt hit his chest as he read the time. Kuroo had been awake. Kenma decided to answer. Hopefully, Kuroo would be awake now. 

[Soulmate](Kenma): Hey, sorry I only saw your message today.  
No worries!: [Kuroo]  
How did you sleep?:[Kuroo]  
[Soulmate](Kenma): I slept alright and you?  
Pretty good.: [Kuroo]  
As you know, I went to bed pretty late haha: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): yeah, what were you doing?  
[Soulmate](Kenma): If you don’t mind me asking. 

I was studying: [Kuroo]   
I sometimes get carried away: [Kuroo]  
[Soulmate](Kenma): Oh okay   
I’m going to be a bit busy till about 4: [Kuroo]  
If you want, if this isn’t too forward, I could call you on the way home: [Kuroo]

[Soulmate](Kenma): I normally don’t like calling   
[Soulmate](Kenma): But   
[Soulmate](Kenma): I’m sure we could do it.   
Great!! : [Kuroo]  
I really like talking to you. : [Kuroo]  
[Soulmate](Kenma): Really?   
Of course, you’re amazing!: [Kuroo]   
I haven’t known you for long but I really like talking to you:[Kuroo]  
Talking with you just feels right: [Kuroo]  
Not to mention that you’re really cute: [Kuroo]

Kenma’s face heated, a bright smile plastered on his face. He’d never felt like this. This made his stomach flutter and his heart burst. He felt wanted. He felt happy. His insides were screaming. He loved this. Normally, being paid attention to was something he hated but now, now it was something he loved. Having Kuroo say something like that was something Kenma never knew he needed to hear. 

[Soulmate](Kenma): wow, I really like talking to you too. :)  
I’m so sorry: [Kuroo]  
I’m loving this: [Kuroo]  
But I have a chem test and then three other classes: [Kuroo]  
I promise I’ll call you when I get out of class: [Kuroo]  
[Soulmate](Kenma): I look forward to it. :) 

+++  
Kenma sat on the examination table, his feet dangling freely. His eyes scanned the white walls. Kenma hated being here. He hated hospitals. Kenma has been having a harder time breathing during the past few days, earning him a trip to the doctor. He’d gone through this all already. Kenma hated this, it was always the same thing over and over; he came in, got an examination, got an X-Ray on his lungs, discussed with the doctor and went home. Sometimes things would be extra sucky and he’d have to stay overnight for observation. Sometimes he wished that everything could just end. Kenma hated this life. He hated the attention, he hated the pain, he hated having to carry an oxygen tank around with him. Why did it have to be him? Everyone else from his high school was normal, they all had jobs and lives and everything was great. Lev was an uncle, Hinata made it big in volley-ball, all his friends were good. 

A doctor walked in, Kenma’s mother sat in the chair waiting for the man to say something. As the man tried to speak, another doctor walked in, this one being none other than Lev’s sister. Kenma hated to say it but he was relieved. 

“Mr. Kozume, I am doctor Kobayashi and this is my colleague Dr. Haiba,” the man gave a kind smile. “What seems to be the problem?” 

Before Kenma could answer, his mother cut him off, “He’s been having trouble breathing. The past few days, merely walking from his room to the bathroom is a task,” leave it to mom to know it all. 

“Well why don’t we have a listen okay?” Kenma knew the drill, shirt off. Turn to the side and breathe deeply when told to. He felt a twinge of embarrassment having Lev’s sister there. Kenma sheepishly reloved his baggy t-shirt. His thin frame shivered as the cold air hit his skin. Kenma refused to raise his eyes. This was something he’d hated. Removing clothing was something that bothered Kenma. He preferred staying covered up.   
After having been examined and having gone through the X-rays, Kenma sat awaiting the doctors’ comments. This was the scary part, this was the worst part. Kenma spent the next fifteen minutes Kenma and his mother both worried in silence. Was the cancer worse? Did they need more meds? What could possibly be wrong? 

Kenma felt his heart rate increase every time the sound of footsteps passed the door. No matter how many times his mother put a hand on his knee and said it would be alright, she knew that he was overthinking it. 

Dr. Kobayashi walked in, medical chart in hand, he had a grim look on his face. “Mr. Kozume, I regret to inform you that the cancer has spread. It has spread into your trachea. I think it would be best to keep you overnight.” Kenma let out a soft sigh before nodding. He could refuse but what good would that give? All Kenma wanted was to be better. 

Sitting in his newly found room, Kenma stared off into space; his mind wondered, remembering his time with Kuroo, his years at Nekoma, his summers when Hinata would come over. Kenma wondered if this was it. Was he doomed to live this over and over till he died? When would he die? 

A light knock on the door caused Kenma to glance up. It was Lev. Great it was Lev. The tall, gray haired boy entered and allowed himself to sand by Kenma. “How are you doing? My sister told me about you being back here,” Kenma gave a warm smile before pulling a chair closer to the bed. As bad as Lev was in high school, Kenma was happy to have him here. 

“I’m fine. It’s just overnight.” 

“Do you want to watch volley-ball? Or would you like to play a game? We could play on your switch,” Lev gave the boy another kind smile. 

“Sure,” Kenma pointed to his backpack on the floor by the bed, “It’s in my bag,”normally, Kenma would want to be alone but this was something he felt that he needed. Kenma would never voice it nor would he acknowledge the thought but Lev was a good friend. 

The gray haired boy came back with the device. Setting it up, he tried his best to set the screen up for them both to see. “This good?” Lev asked, making sure that Kenma was alright. The blond nodded. “What do you want to play?” 

“Umm, you can choose. I don’t care,” in all honesty, Kenma really didn’t care. It was a distraction and a distraction was what he needed. Lev nodded as picked through the options. There sure were a lot. 

Lev finally decided on playing Mario Kart. This came as no surprise to Kenma, it was a game that was widely popular among his limited friends. Hours passed and the boys played games till they were startled by a phone ringing. Kenma’s phone. Kenma’s eyes widened. This was a terrible time. The blond tried to get out of bed to get the phone from the pocket of his jacket but Lev beat him to it. 

Lev (with a smirk): Kenma’s phone, Lev speaking. 

Kuroo (in a confused tone): Umm hello?

Lev: Hi! Who are you?

Kuroo: Tetsuro Kuroo, Kenma’s soulmate. 

Lev (Smirking again and fighting off an annoyed Kenma): Soulmate you say. Well I’m Lev Haiba, Kenma’s friend from high school. 

Kenma: Give me the phone Lev! This isn’t a game.   
Lev: So Kuroo, tell me about yourself! 

Kenma (hitting Lev): I swear to god if you don’t give me my phone back! Lev Haiba I will end you. Hey don’t do that!

Kuroo: I am a second year college student, I played volleyball in high school, I’m Kenma’s soulmate and I’d love to meet you. 

Lev: Oh well I do hope to meet you too. I’ll let you talk to Kenma now. 

Lev handed Kenma the phone earning a look of annoyance. 

Kenma: Sorry about that. Lev is a bit of a pain in the ass. 

Kuroo: I think he sounded lovely. I’d love to meet your friends. 

Kenma: He’s not my friend. Just a guy that shows up. 

Lev(in an offended tone): Do friends play Mario Kart for hours on end? Do friends not come visit each other at the hospital? 

Kuroo: Wait, you're at the hospital? Is everything okay?

Kenma: Good job Lev. Yeah, just overnight. No big deal. 

Kuroo: What hospital? 

Kenma: Why? 

Kuroo: I’m coming to see you. What hospital? 

Kenma: You really don’t have to. You have a lot of work. 

Kuroo: No arguments, now tell me what hospital. 

Kenma: Tōkyō Teishin Hospital

Kuroo: I’ll be there in twenty minutes. 

Kenma: Kuroo, you really don’t have to. 

Kuroo: I’ll see you soon. 

With that, Kuroo hung up leaving Kenma without words. The blond sat for a moment, phone still to his ear. 

“Good job Lev, now he’s coming,” Kenma felt a growing annoyance. He didn’t want to tell Kuroo. He didn’t want things to get too personal too fast. Now Kuroo was visiting him at the hospital. 

“Sorry, I wasn’t thinking,” Lev scratched the back of his neck. He hated upsetting Kenma even if he did it often. They just had a friendship where one wrong move would annoy Kenma but Lev understood. “Do you want me to leave before he arrives?” 

“If you want,” Kenma’s tone was cold. This was a line he didn’t want crossed and Lev understood that he’d crossed. With Kenma, things couldn’t get too personal. 

“I’ll go. I’ll help pick things up though. Do you want me to put your switch back?” 

“No, could you bring me my bag though?” Lev nodded and did as asked. 

“Thank you,” Kenma did enjoy his afternoon with Lev despite this incident. 

“I’m sorry for how the afternoon ended but I did like the rest of it,” Lev gave one final smile before leaving. 

Kenma sat in silence. Kuroo was coming to visit him in the hospital. He was unsure if he liked the idea or hated it. This was like something out of a movie, a movie Kenma knew he’d never watch. This was something his mother would watch. Though this was something Kenma never liked before, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.


	7. Chapter 7

Kuroo made his way through the glass doors. At a fast pace, he made his way to the desk. The nurse greeted him with a warm smile. Her light brown hair was pulled up tightly in a bun, only a few strands hung loose. She seemed awfully young to be working in a hospital but Kuroo avoided asking. The only thing on his mind was Kenma. 

“Hello, I’m looking for a Kozume Kenma,” the raven-haired boy gave the nurse a kind smile. Her fingers flipped through the files before stopping. 

“He’s in room 303,” his hands clutched the edge of the desk. Her smile shone brightly. Kuroo smiled and thanked her before making his way to the elevator. He felt his heart rate increase with every step. Though Kuroo knew that Kenma was probably alright, he still had a worried feeling in the pit of his stomach. 

As the doors dinged, Kuroo felt his emotions build up. He wanted to make sure Kenma was okay. He didn’t even know the guy and yet something made him care so much. He felt something, an overprotectiveness that he’d never felt. 

Glancing at the numbers above the doors, Kuroo glided through the halls looking for room 303. His feet moved with determination. His heart beating rapidly, Kuroo finally arrived. 

The dark-haired boy poked his head in only to see his soulmate sitting in bed playing some game. Kuroo brought his hand up to gently knock on the white door. Kenma’s eyes never left his game. 

“Come in,” the blond said, still not looking up from his game. 

“Is that any way to greet your soulmate?” Kuroo teased. He gave Kenma a smile. 

“Oh sorry, I thought you were mom,” Kenma put down his game, something that he rarely did. Right now, it felt right for him to put it away. 

“How are you feeling?” Kuroo’s voice was genuine, his eyes showed worry. Kenma felt that he actually cared. 

“I’m alright… I suppose I should tell you why I’m here…” 

Kenma was cut off by his soulmate, “You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Kuroo took a seat in the chair that Lev had pulled towards the bed. 

“No no, I should tell you,” Kenma took a deep breath before continuing, “About a year and a half ago, right after nationals, breathing became oddly difficult and I eventually sought medical help. The doctors found a cancerous tumour in my lungs. It wasn’t big; maybe the size of a grape but it's slowly been growing. Now, it’s in my trachea. The tank helps, I barely noticed that I was having trouble breathing,” he lied, “Mom was the one who wanted me to come. Turns out she was right. So now I’m here overnight, maybe longer. They’re gonna tell me when the other tests come in,” Kenma played as though he didn’t care but he was terrified. 

“You’re not alright, I can tell. You’re worried. You’re overthinking,” Kuroo didn’t know how he knew this but he did. He felt that Kenma was worried. The blond just looked at him, not knowing what to answer. He was worried; wouldn’t anyone be? 

“I’m on a list, I’ll get new lungs eventually. I’ll get bumped up if it gets worse but I’m on a list,” Kenma gave a forced smile. 

“Can I hold your hand?” The dark-haired boy just wanted to hold hands for an unknown reason. Kuroo felt like it was what he was supposed to do. Kenma nodded, pink dusting his cheeks. 

Kuroo reached his hand over, intertwining his fingers with Kenma’s. Something about this just felt right; everything between the two felt right. Their hands locked together perfectly; like they'd been sculpted to be together. They fit like a key in a lock. 

Kenma’s heart beat just a bit faster, his smile was just a bit brighter and his life seemed just a bit better. He knew that he was meant to be with Kuroo. It just felt normal. Kenma felt as though he’d known Kuroo his entire life. There was a lingering comfort between the two. There was familiarity. 

This was when Kenma finally started to believe in soulmates. He understood, he knew the feeling. Something about Kuroo made him want to hold on and never let go. He enjoyed being with Kuroo. He enjoyed his presence, the energy was good, the air was clear. 

“So Kenma, who was that Lev guy?” Kenma raised a brown and gave a smirk. 

“Jealous are we?” Kuroo’s cheeks flushed. He knew he wasn’t jealous. He just wanted to meet him. 

“No, I was just curious. How long have you been friends?” Kuroo just felt like he had to meet him. It was only right for him to meet Kenma’s friends. 

“I wouldn’t say a friend… more like a guy I used to play volleyball with in high school. He kinda gets on my nerves sometimes. Shoyo on the other hand, he’s a good friend of mine but he lives a few hours away. I met him playing volleyball in high school. He was from another team,” Kenma realized how much he missed Shoyo. It had been a while since they’d talked. 

Kuroo saw the expression on Kenma’s face. He knew that there was a little sorrow when Kenma thought about his friend.“This Shoyo, you miss him?” Kenma simply nodded. 

“Yeah, we met my second year. He has such a passion for volleyball. It’s like no matter how bad the game is going, he still can’t help but stay positive. He sees greatness in the other players. He’s in his third year at Karasuno High School. Maybe I’ll get to see him during his next break, ” Kenma looked down at his hand still linked with Kuroo’s. Should he tell Shoyo about Kuroo? He'd want to know. He’d be so happy. He was still waiting to turn 18. Shoyo just couldn’t wait for his string to appear. It haunted him not knowing who his soulmate was. 

“He sounds great. I wonder if I’ll get to meet him. Maybe when you get better, we could get a group of friends to play,” Kuroo gave Kenma’s hand a comforting squeeze. Kenma’s eyes never left their linked hands. 

The thought of being able to play normally, like he used to, brought Kenma great joy. That was really all he wanted; he wanted to be normal. He wanted to play again. He wanted to be himself again. Kuroo noticed his blank expression. Placing his hand on their linked hands, Kuroo couldn’t help but feel grateful. He had finally met his soulmate. He was holding his soulmate’s hand. 

The boys were taken aback when a female voice echoed through the room, “Awn! Kenma, sweetheart! Is this Kuroo?” Both boys glanced up to see Kenma’s mother. Both boys felt their faces heat. Kenma Quickly pulled his hand away. 

“May I come in?” Kenma gave his mother a nod before looking down at his blankets. 

“Pleasure to meet you Mrs. Kozume,” Kuroo said as he bowd. He wasn’t expecting to see Kenma’s mother but he assumed it was for the better. 

“The pleasure is all mine,” the woman said before bowing herself. She gave Kuroo a warm smile. She hadn’t planned to see him but it was a pleasant surprise. 

“Are you okay for tonight or do you want me to stay?” Kenma’s mother assumed that the boys would want time together. She felt that it was not her place to get in the way. Her boy was eighteen, surely he could make his own decisions. He was under observation at the hospital. Everything was okay, she tried to comfort herself. Though she wanted to give her son space, she also wanted to make sure that he was okay and safe. 

“I think I can manage for the night. Dad might need help tonight; you know how he is with cooking. Could you bring me a few things from home?” Kenma knew that his father needed his mother more than he did. It’s not like he’d need anything. He wasn’t going to make his mother sleep in a chair by his bed. He couldn’t ask her to do that. She’d done it so many times. She’d been at his bedside through everything. He was a grown boy, he was okay for a night at the hospital alone.   
“Are you sure you’ll be alright?” His mother placed her hand on his shoulder. Her touch was comforting. Something Kenma knew he needed but didn’t want to admit. Getting told that your cancer has spread wasn’t something that you wanted to hear. Kenma wanted to be okay, he wanted to stop worrying his mother. It broke him to see her struggle through this. THis was why he was scared to meet his soulmate. He didn’t want to burden Kuroo with this. What if he were to die? If Kuroo hadn’t met him he wouldn’t be half as hurt when he was gone. 

“Yeah, could you just bring me my phone charger, my switch charger, a few sets of clothes and my shower stuff, please?” 

“Of course sweetheart, I’ll go get that right away. I’ll be back in about half an hour,” she gently placed a kiss on his head before leaving. Kenma smiled to himself. He knew she cared. 

“She seems like a great mom,” Kuroo spoke after a long silence. He was right, she was a great mom, no she wasn’t a great mom. She was the best mom. 

“Only the best,” Kenma never understood the others who were embarrassed to say that their parents cared for them. Wasn’t it normal for your parents to love you? It wasn’t something to be embarrassed about. Sure, Kenma didn’t enjoy having any type of attention drawn to him but he never once said that he hated his parents; he thought it was absurd to say such a thing. 

Kuroo placed his forearms on the bed and simply watched Kenma. The blond was lost in thought. His eyes looked tired, how was he taking this? How was he feeling? This wasn’t something you just grazed over the way he did. Kuroo struggled to know if he should ask or not. 

“Kenma?” Kuroo asked, making his soulmate look up. Kenma’s eyes locked with Kuroo’s, “How are you really doing? Not physically, emotionally,” Keroo’s voice dripped with worry, his heart ached knowing that Kenma wasn’t doing well. He barely knew this boy and it hurt him deeply to see him in this position. 

Kuroo had observed Kenma’s interaction with his mother. Their relationship was a good one but Kenma held back a lot. Kenma’s eyes carried sorrow that his mouth refused to voice. Kuroo just knew, he met kenma a month ago and yet this was it, he felt like he’d known him since birth. Kenma’s shoulders carried a weight that most boys his age couldn’t imagine. This was something that needed to be talked about. Kuroo thought that Kenma must have been one of the strongest people he’d ever met. To keep all his emotions in, to keep all his fears in, Kenma must be suffering like no other boy Kuroo knew. 

“I’m okay I guess. Sure it sucks but it’s life. What am I supposed to do? I can’t pretend it’s not there but I can’t just cry every day. Sure, it’s hard to get up and roll this thing around every day, sure it’s hard to see my mother, it’s even harder when I hear her crying, crying because of me,” Kenma didn’t know why he was saying all this. Warm tears streamed from Kenma’s eyes. The blond didn’t know why he was crying, now of all times. It was just happening, “Hearing her cry because I am sick, hearing my father worry about him outliving me, sure it’s hard to say that I had to drop out of college because my cancer got so bad, sure it was hard to have to tell my friends that I can’t play with them because my lungs are too bad, sure it was hard to fake being okay around you and Bokuto, sure it’s hard but that’s fucking life,” Kenma was now breaking out into uncontrollable sobs. He hadn’t cried in so long, he talked about this, sure he had therapy to go to but he never had to be this honest. Something about Kuroo just made him want to say what he had to say. 

Kuroo reached over, placing his hands over Kenma’s. His heart sank through every word. How hadn’t he noticed that Kenma was suffering when they played? Why did Kenma have to deal with this? He didn’t deserve this. No one did but Kenma deserved it less than anyone. How was Kuroo supposed to fix this? There was nothing he could say right now. There was nothing that anyone could say to make Kenma feel better. Kenma let this build up for years. This was something that he couldn’t change by clicking a few buttons. Kenma had to deal with it. The thought of that made Kuroo sick to his stomach. He just wanted to fix it, to make it all better with one word. 

All Kuroo could do was sit there in silence, his hands rubbing Kenma’s forearms. It was too soon to hug but Kuroo felt that he had to do something. “I’m so sorry Kenma…” was all that the boy managed to say. It broke Kuroo’s heart to not be able to help. For now, all he could do was hold Kenma’s hands.


	8. Chapter 8

Kenma awoke with a jolt, his heart pounding against his ribcage, the boy gasped for breath. No air came to him. Unable to breath, Kenma panicked. His body convulsed, trying anything to catch even a bit of air. Nothing. Reaching for his help button felt like an impossible task. Groping the sheets, the blond tried his best to find it. Fear ran through his mind. Was this the end? No he couldn’t die now, Kenma’s mother would suffer terribly. Kenma’s mind started to cloud. Fingers tingling, Kenma started to feel lightheaded. He continued to reach. Weakly, Knema found the button, fingers trying to press hard enough to alert someone, anyone. 

Kenma awoke, woozy, his mother at his bedside. His face was now covered, oxygen mask. His eyelids heavy, Kenma looked around to see his mother, and to his surprise, Kuroo stood by the wall. His arms crossed over his chest, Kuroo watched Kenma. Their eyes locked only to make Kenma look away. 

Internally scolding himself, Kenma desperately wanted to know why Kuroo was here. He didn’t want him to feel like he had to be here, like he had to be there for Kenma. He didn’t want Kuroo to have to live this. He was the sick kid. He didn’t want to involve more people than he had to. He hated that Kuroo had to deal with this. They weren’t even dating and he was here. He was right there standing against the wall.

“Oh Kenma, sweetheart, are you alright?” His mother exclaimed, he hands over her chest. She hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep since she’d settled in her bed, the night before. Leaving Kenma at the hospital had weighed on her nerves. Since her baby had gotten sick, her entire life was devoted to him. 

“Yeah, I guess,” Kenma’s lungs burned as he spoke those words. He hated this. He hated every moment of this. Was it too much to want a normal life? Kenma looked at his mother, he hated himself for hurting her. He knew that this broke her. He knew that this was her worst fear. It broke her every time she had to rush him to the hospital. 

Kenma didn’t want to make a fuss, he didn’t want to complain; all he wanted was to be okay. He wanted a normal life, maybe even a life with Kuroo. A life where he and Kuroo could enjoy it to the fullest. 

Kenma’s eyes scanned the room before allowing them to close. With a struggled breath, Kenma tried to shift in his bed. He knew that his lungs were getting worse, he knew that it was torturing his mother. He saw the look in her eyes. He saw Kuroo. Kenma just wanted to make everyone stop caring for him. 

It broke his heart but his current wish was to have no one because if he had no one, his death wouldn’t hurt them. This was the predicament: Kenma wanted Kuroo, he wanted to have a relationship with him and he wanted to have a life with his soulmate but the last thing he wanted was to hurt him and die. Kenma wanted to hold Kuroo’s hand on the beach, he wanted to take those couple photos in the photo booths, he wanted to kiss him under the fireworks, Kenma wanted Kuroo. Maybe it was almost dying but Kenma knew that there was something about Kuroo that he wanted. There was something about him. Kuroo had a kind heart and a pure soul; something Kenma admired greatly. 

+++

Kenma woke, to his surprise, Shoyo and Akaashi were seated, peacefully waiting for him to awake. A smile tugged the corners of the blond’s mouth. They were here. Kenma’s friends were here. 

“Kenma!” Hinata’s cheery voice echoed through the room. It would be a lie for Kenma to say that he wasn’t happy to see his friends. 

“Hey, Shoyo,” Kenma spoke, still groggy from his nap. His smile grew wider as Akaashi approached the bed. 

“Hey,” hands in his pockets, Akaashi spoke in a much quieter tone than Hinata had previously. 

“Hey,” Kenma’s voice was weak. Over the past few days, talking had become significantly more painful. But he tried anyway. Right now, he was happy. He didn’t want to focus on the pain or the fear of dying. Kenma wanted to enjoy time with his friends. 

Without hesitation, Hinata jumped into bed, sitting next to Kenma. He’d grown to know no boundaries with Kenma. It was something that the redhead enjoyed. He was able to ask Kenma anything. Kenma on the other hand was a little uneasy with this comfort but he let it pass. Akaashi was like Kenma, he was quiet and reserved. He and Kenma grew to have a friendship based purely on volleyball and quietness. 

“So how’s Kegeyama?” Kenma asked as he propped himself up. 

“He’s good. He says he’s sorry he couldn’t be here,” Hinata’s eyes lit up when talking about his soulmate. It was rather nice to see. A glow dusted his face when talking about his raven-haired boyfriend. 

“It’s no trouble,” Kenma gave him a smile before looking over at Akaashi, “So what’s new with you?” Akaashi’s face flushed. His heart thumped in his chest.   
“Not much… I met my soulmate,” Akaashi’s eyes fixed the floor as he tried not to show embarrassment. 

“That’s great!” Kenma tried to exclaim as well as he could but it was difficult. His throat started to ache. 

“What about you?” Hianta asked, “What’s new with you?” 

“Well… the cancer spread, I met my soulmate and other than that, Lev came to see me the other day.” Both boys’ eyes widened. Kenma has casually slipped that out. 

“Soulmate huh?” Akaashi teased. 

“Yeah, we met at the park. He was playing volley-ball with a friend. They got me to set for them.” 

“Well, that’s nice! You haven’t set for me in forever!” Hinata whined. Kenma simply glanced over and raised a brow. 

“I’ve missed you guys,” Kenma said in a struggled tone. 

“We missed you too,” the boys said in unison.


	9. Chapter 9

Kenma’s eyes fluttered open as he heard a chair being drug across the floor to his bedside. To no surprise, Kenma awoke to see Kuroo. The blond gave a faint smile before allowing his eyes to close once again. Though he tried to keep it concealed, Kenma was suffering greatly. Inhaling had become a task, a very painful one at that. It ached to intake air. Sleeping had become a way of coping. It took several tries for him to sleep comfortably but it was better than nothing. 

Even talking had been reduced to as little as possible. Kenma had never been much of a talker but now it was no longer intentional. His voice came out as simple squeaks or cracks. It reminded him of his pubescent self. How he hated this. Kuroo had been coming over every day. Kenma’s own mother hadn’t come half as many times as Kuroo had. This warmed Kenma’s heart. 

Without hesitation, Kuroo took Kenma’s hand in his. Not saying a word, both boys stayed still, silence between the two. A beautiful, intimate silence, a silence Kuroo knew Kenma needed. Bringing Kenma’s hand to his lips, Kuroo placed gentle kisses along the back of the boy’s hand. The red string moved along with their hands. Seeing the string everywhere he went brought Kuroo a comfort. Somehow, this comforted him in knowing that Kenma was at the other end of the string.

“Can I join you?” Kuroo asked, his eyes eyeing the bed. Kenma simply gave a nod and struggled to scoot aside. Kuroo confidently climbed into bed with Kenma. Both boys blushed at this newfound step. With little hesitation, Kuroo wrapped his arm around Kenma, allowing the blond to rest his head on his soulmate’s shoulder. 

Both blushing, the boys found comfort in this. Their bodies so close. It was calming for both. Kuroo’s other arm placed itself over Kenma’s stomach. Holding him close, Kuroo felt the need to hold on forever, scared that if he’d let go, Kenma would disappear. Kenma’s frail body felt weightless on Kuroo’s side. 

“Would you like to watch something on my phone?” Kuroo asked, his head resting on Kenma’s. 

“Sure,” Kenma said in a frail tone. His voice catching in his throat. Kuroo pulled out his phone from his pocket and allowed Kenma to pick the movie. Call me by your name was the movie he picked. The boys settled, content with each other’s touch. They drifted into a state of pure bliss. 

+++  
When Kenma awoke, Kuroo was still holding him tight. Their bodies pressed together. Kuroo radiated a warmth that Kenma greatly enjoyed. Snuggling closer, Kenma allowed himself to fall into his emotions. Though it may soon, Kenma knew the words he wished he could say. The words he wished he had the confidence to say. 

Right then, in that moment, Kenma was sure of one thing. Being in Kuroo’s arms finally helped him understand what his parents had. He finally understood what a soulmate was. In that moment, all he felt, all he wanted, all he was sure of was Kuroo. The red string around his finger reminded him that it was real. This was actually happening. He was being held, someone wanted him. Someone cared for him. His soulmate wanted to be his soulmate. The cancer didn’t scare Kuroo off. It was as if he didn’t even have it. 

“You know, one day, I’m going to get you out of here. We’re gonna have a nice house, maybe a few cats, a gaming room for you, anything you want,” Kuroo broke the silence. His bold words shocked Kenma. “And one day I’m gonna marry you,” Kenma felt himself blush, the blond hid his face in Kuroo’s shoulder. “We’re gonna have our happy ending,” Kuroo’s words brought tears to Kenma’s eyes. 

It was surprising to Kenma that Kuroo had such hope. Kenma had partially already accepted death. How was Kuroo really so sure that Kenma would ever make it out of the hospital? One night had turned into two and two turned into a week, a week turned into a few weeks and a few weeks turned into months. It was four months since Kenma had been home. Kuroo had not once complained about coming to the hospital. He came as if it was simply Kenma’s home. But this was Kenma’s home. He spent more time in the hospital than what he did outside of the hospital. 

“Really?” Kenma asked in a weak voice. Pain stuck his throat as he spoke but he spoke for Kuroo. 

“You bet. I’m going to be your husband and we’ll have a life together. We’re going to grow old together. We’ll be the couple everyone talks about. I really care about you,” hearing those words was all Kenma needed. Tears continued to roll down his cheeks. 

“Hey, hey, hey, what’s wrong?” Kuroo asked, concerned that he’d overstepped. 

Kenma pulled out his phone and proceeded to send Kuroo a text. 

[Soulmate](Kenma): You really do? You actually want to be with me? You’re not scared? You’re not worried to get hurt? You care about me? 

“Kenma, you are single handedly the best person I’ve ever met. You are awesome, you’re kind, you’re fun, you’re so cute, you’re everything I want. I want to be with you till death do us part.” 

Kenma sat up, his body now facing Kuroo’s. The boy’s sat for a few moments, simply looking into each other’s eyes. Kuroo gently placed his hands on Kenma’s cheeks. Before the blond could react, Kuroo brought his lips closer to Kenma’s. Brushing together, the boys kissed. For a simple second, they were alone in the world. Nothing around them. Their hearts beat maddly. They were in their own world. Forgetting the cancer, forgetting death, forgetting the world, Kenma eagerly kissed Kuroo back. His hands now holding Kuroo’s forearms. Their lips intertwined creating a perfect moment for the two.


	10. Chapter 10

Kenma’s eyes crowded with tears as he looked at the X-rays of his respiratory system. Large white forms covered the once pink tissue. He didn’t understand why this was happening, he’d done the treatment plan recommended, he’d followed what he was told, yet here he was, struggling to breath, looking at his damaged lungs. Kuroo’s hand held his tightly, his mother held his other hand. 

This wasn’t normal, this wasn’t what he wanted. The more it went, the sicker he got. Kenma wanted normal. He wanted to be a normal 18 year old boy. He wanted to be with Kuroo, he wanted to be out of this hospital, he wanted to be loved, he wanted his friends. 

Kenma’s mind went elsewhere when the doctor started to speak. Buzzing filled his ears, he didn’t want to hear it. He didn’t want to know. It was too close. He had Kuroo now. They were getting closer, he was happy with Kuroo. He wanted Kuroo. He wanted to do what normal couples did, he wanted to move in together, get a little too drunk and mess around, he wanted to be able to sleep in on sunday mornings together, he wanted to have date nights, he wanted them to be together, he wanted a normal relationship, one outside of these walls. Outside of the hospital. Kenma couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept in his bed. He wanted to be normal. 

Life wasn’t a video game, he desperately just wanted to hit reset. He wanted to start this level over. He wanted to change his choices, he wanted to meet Kuroo at the right time, he wanted to meet Kuroo at a coffee shop or something cliche like that, somewhere where he’d drop his books or bump into Kuroo, somewhere other than here. He wanted to give Kuroo the love story that he deserved. Kuroo didn’t deserve this. He should have a soulmate that can keep up.   
Kuroo’s thumb gently caressed Kenma’s as the two boys quietly listened to the older man. In the past few weeks, he’d been known to only bring bad news. With every passing day, Kenma was growing weaker and weaker. He hated to admit it but he knew death was trying to sneak up on him. Kenma had been desperately running away from death. He’d held onto Kuroo, hoping he’d help him run a little further. 

Kenma trailed his eyes along the red string. He watched it glow as if it had a heart beat, each puls created a simple yet noticeable feeling on his pinky. The string brought him comfort, with it, he knew that Kuroo was there. He knew that the shorter the string got, the closer he got to Kuroo. 

“Are you listening Kenma?” Kuroo asked, snapping Kenma out of his thoughts. The blond nodded before looking at the man. 

“As I was saying, we could try to operate but we can’t promise any miracles. I was discussing with UNOS and it might be a little longer than expected to get a transfer but we could try to operate and remove as much damaged tissue as possible. This process is not often performed this far in but we were willing to take a chance with you. Your body is young, you have a chance with this,” the doctor spoke in a sure tone, almost convincing Kenma that he was going to live. 

“Possibility of death?” Kenma’s mother asked. Truth be told, if it weren’t for her holding his hand, he’d have forgotten that she was there.

“Very high,” with those words, Kenma’s mother choked back a sob. She’d been trying to avoid the tears. She wanted to show confidence in the medical professionals but it had grown to be increasingly difficult with each passing day, seeing her son in such pain. Her heart broke every time she saw him in such a state. Yet, Kuroo managed to make him smile. 

“How do you feel about this Kenma?” Kenma’s heart raced, how was he supposed to know this now. It was like flipping a coin on life. Like choosing if he were to live or die in seconds. Heads, he gets the surgery and dies on the table, tails, he doesn’t and dies in a few days anyway. Was it worth the try? Should he even care at this point.   
“Why don’t we give him longer than thirty seconds to decide?” Kuroo asked, trying to ease Kenma’s mind. He knew how much he was overthinking it, he knew how bad things had gotten and he knew Kenma. He knew how much the blond was caught up in his own head at the moment. 

“Yes, of course, we can discuss it tomorrow?” the man asked, earning a nod from Kenma. 

+++

Kenma’s eyes scanned the board in front of him. Why was Kuroo making him play that? Chess of all games. “Watching the pieces won’t make them move on their own,” the dark haired boy chuckled. “Come on, this is fun,” he smiled at the blond, earning a smile back. 

“This is not what I’d consider fun,” Kenma scribbled on a piece of paper. Talking had become impossible now, leading them to communicate through text or pen and paper. 

“Please, for me,” Kuroo made a face in an attempt to pout but only made Kenma laugh. That was something Kuroo loved seeing. Though Kenma didn’t laugh often, when he did, he lit up the entire room; or so that’s how Kuroo saw it. 

“Not to rush you or anything, but do you know if you want the surgery or not?” Kenma looked up at his soulmate like a deer caught in the headlights. He’d been procrastinating thinking about it. He already knew what he wanted to do but he was scared to change his mind. 

Kenma nodded, not bothering to write on the paper. He didn’t want to say this. 

“And what would this decision be?” Kuroo reached his hand over to Kenma’s only to be dodged. On his bed, Kenma pulled his knees to his chest and watched out the window. He knew what he wanted but why couldn’t he tell Kuroo? “You know I’ll support you no matter what, right?” Kenma nodded again, lying. 

“Listen Kenma, there’s something I need to tell you-” Kuroo was cut off by the sound of footsteps. 

“Hello boys! Kenma, your mother should be here soon. Have you made your decision?” the doctor spoke, his tone, confident and commanding. 

Kenma nodded and handed the doctor a slip of paper from under his pillow. Kenma didn’t want to disappoint those around him. He wanted to take a chance. The doctor scanned the paper thoroughly. His eyes widened in shock as he read the curly handwriting. Kuroo sat, awaiting an answer, something telling him what Kenma chose. 

“Very well then, I’ll get the paperwork for you to sign.” the doctor said before walking off. Kuroo sat for a moment before asking again. 

“What did you choose?” 

Kenma took out his phone, his fingers slowly typing the words Kuroo desperately awaited. The blond hit send, finally giving Kuroo the relief he needed as he received the notification.


	11. Chapter 11

Kuroo walked along the stone path, the cold fall air hitting him. This was the first time in weeks that he hadn’t gone straight to the hospital after class. His eyes scanned the colourful stands. Public markets were always something he’d enjoyed as a child. He’d often go before his mother passed. They’d spend the day together, taking their time, observing everything the vendors had to offer. Fresh vegetables of all colours covered the tables, some tables were covered in beautifully artistic creations, others had pastries, some had freshly baked bread. 

As he passed by a table, Kuroo noticed a little girl, not much other than eight. On her table, she had knotted bracelets. Colours matching, the weaves were different for most, some big and some small, some even in packs of two. Kuroo reached down and picked up one of these packs. This one in particular had caught his eye, the knots forming V shapes in both black and red. 

“How much for this?” He asked, bringing a smile to the little girl’s face. A spark lit in her eyes.   
“160.73¥ (Yen)” the little girl answered, opening her small change box. Kuroo pulled out his wallet, before paying the girl. She gave him a toothy grin as he placed the money in her hand. 

“Thank you,” he said before walking off. He played with the packaging while his mind thought about Kenma. Today he was getting the surgery. Kenma was going under in simply a few hours. Kuroo felt a weight pressing down on his chest, every time he thought about Kenma and the surgery, his heart raced and his stress built up. It was now that he desperately wanted to study. He wanted to stop worrying. It was unsure whether Kenma would even survive the surgery. 

Kuroo felt tears building in his eyes, though he’d not known Kenma for long, he loved him. He loved Kenma with all of his being. He knew that deep down Kenma was meant to be his soulmate. 

Kuroo’s eyes glanced down at the string on his finger. It had grown to be a comfort for him. It helped him know that Kenma was alright, that he was alive. He was bound to him, despite how far they may be from each other, he knew that Kenma was on the other end. 

Kuroo wiped his tears with his sleeve. He couldn’t cry now. He had to be strong, he had to be strong for Kenma. He needed to put on a happy face, he needed to be positive. Kuroo wanted to be the one to make Kenma feel positive. He had to tell himself that Kenma was going to live through it. Maybe he’d even get new lungs and he’d be able to live another twenty years. 

+++

When Kuroo arrived at Kenma’s room, the door was closed. It wasn’t often that the door was left unopened. He allowed himself to knock, he was questioning why it was closed. The door opened, Kuroo was faced by a man. 

“Are you a friend of Kenma’s?” The man asked in a stern tone. Kuroo had never seen this man before yet he was being asked if he knew Kenma. 

“Yeah, I’m Tetsurou Kuroo,” Kuroo’s voice was confident. His shoulders were squared and his face was stern. 

“Oh yes, my wife talked to me about you. The volleyball player?” Kuroo simply nodded, “You’re not just his friend, you’re Kenma’s soulmate,” it was now that Kuroo noticed the man’s bloodshot eyes. It looked like he’d been crying. Kuroo gave him a smile before giving way. Kuroo stepped into the room, causing Kenma to look over. Both boys smiled before even realizing it. 

Kuroo walked over to Kenma’s bed. With ease, he climbed up into the bed, wrapping his arm around Kenma. Kenma allowed his head to fall on Kuroo’s shoulder. 

“I’ll umm leave you two be. Kenma, It’ll join your mother at the cafeteria,” the man spoke before leaving, his hand closing the door. 

“I have something for you,” Kuroo said with a smile. This caused Kenma to remove his head from Kuroo’s shoulder. Kuroo moved, placing himself to be able to face Kenma. Kuroo reached into the pocket of his hoodie, his hand grasping the packet. “I was walking around in a market and I found these. I thought about you,” Kuroo pulled the bracelets from his pocket. “I know this isn’t a wedding ring but it’s a promise. We both have one.” Kuroo took one of the bracelets from the packet and placed it around Kenma’s wrist. Kuroo allowed himself to peper kisses all over Kenma’s hand and wrist, all the way up his forearm. “You and me, forever,” Kuroo said with a smile. Unable to kiss Kenma due to the oxygen mask, Kuroo simply kissed his forehead. 

Both boys proudly wore their bracelets. Their smiles shone brightly as they spent the time pressed against one another. They both held on as if it were the last time. They didn’t worry about anything, they simply held each other, enveloped in their love. It was then that Kenma finally understood what a soulmate was. What he felt for Kuroo was more than love, he would be unable to describe it even if he were to walk. It was this feeling that made everything a little brighter. Kuroo was like a permanent sun in his life. 

Both boys tried to forget what was to come. They desperately wanted to stop time, to change everything. Kuroo wanted to make it all better and Kenma wanted to get better for Kuroo. They both wanted to make the other happy. In their own way, the boys wanted to have a happy ending. Kuroo’s happy ending would be to have Kenma healthy, living with him, engaged; Kenma’s happy ending would be to give Kuroo the soulmate he deserved. 

“Kenma?” Kuroo questioned, earning a slight head movement from Kenma. “I love you” Kuroo’s voice was so confident yet, tears formed in his eyes, looking at the clock. Someone was about to come and take Kenma away. Though Kenma couldn’t reply, his throat too sore, he simply held on tighter. This was his way of saying “I love you”. 

Kenma felt his own eyes from tears as he heard a knock on the door. He and Kuroo both knew what was happening. A doctor walked in to see both boys tangled together, holding onto each other. 

“Mr. Kozume, we’re here to prep you for surgery. Are you ready?” Kenma looked at the doctor and nodded. Kuroo got the message and slowly left the bed. 

“I’ll see you soon,” Kuroo said before placing a kiss on his soulmate’s head, “I love you,” Kuroo held Kenma’s hand allowing Kenma to squeeze it before letting go. 

“You can join Mr and Mrs. Kozume in the waiting room, Mr. Kuroo,” the doctor spoke and Kuroo listened. Each family member had their turn to say what they had to say. Kenma’s mother had gone, then his father and then Kuroo.

As Kuroo walked away, he felt himself tear up, his heart heavy in his chest. It was hard to stay positive in a time like this. In the past few months, Kenma had become his whole world, he’d become part of Kuroo.


	12. Chapter 12

Kenma felt himself slowly being rolled into another room. His eyes weakly glanced down at his finger. The red string forming a trail from his pinky to Kuroo. He knew that on the other end, Kuroo was there. Kenma tangled the red string around his fingers. He was going to see Kuroo. He was going to see him in a few hours. He couldn’t think otherwise. He needed to be there, he needed to live for his father, for Hinata, for Akaashi, for Lev, for his mother and most importantly, he needed to live for Kuroo. He was going to marry Kuroo, he wanted his happy ending. He wanted Kuroo to have a happy ending. 

Not having noticed, Kenma had lost himself in his thoughts of his future with Kuroo, they were ready to start. “Can you count back from 10 in your head?” the doctor asked. Kenma simply nodded and did so. 

Ten, he thought about when he first met Kuroo. Nine, he thought about Kuroo walking him home. Eight, he thought about how Kuroo’s hand felt in his. Seven, he thought about how Kuroo would smile when he saw him. Six, he thought about how he felt when he woke up to see Kuroo in his hospital room. Five, he thought about his volleyball number, he thought about his team, Hinata and Akaashi. Four, he thought about his mother, her smile and her kindness. Three, he thought about the three words he wished he could voice. Two, he thought about Kuroo’s eyes, the way they lit up when he smiled. And one, he thought about the one string that connected him to Kuroo. Kenma slowly felt himself drift off with every passing number. 

+++  
Kuroo sat in the waiting room, his knee bouncing anxiously. His eyes glued to the string on his finger. Kenma’s mother sat to his right and to her right sat her husband. On Kuroo’s left sat Bokuto and on his left sat Akaashi. Kuroo was originally surprised to see Bokuto here, he’d only met Kenma once but it came to his attention that Bokuto was Akaashi’s soulmate and he’d come for him. 

Bokuto placed his hand on Kuroo’s forearm, snapping him away from his thoughts. “Kuroo, it’s going to be alright,” Bokuto gave him a forced smile. Bokuto knew the pain Kuroo felt in hospitals. Kuroo hated to bring it up but his mother had died and this situation right here brought back feelings from his mother’s passing. “Kenma is going to be alright,” Bokuto said as he gave Kuroo’s arm a light squeeze. 

“I’m going to get coffee,” Kenma’s father stated as he got up, “Anyone want some?” he asked. 

“I’ll take one dear,” his wife said, a pale expression on her face. 

“Could you please bring one for Kuroo?” Bokuto asked, knowing full well that Kuroo needed it. “You know what, I’ll come with you,” he continued. Kenma’s father gave a simple nod. Bokuto got up, leaving the two boys with Kenma’s mother. 

“He really cares about both of you. It means a lot that you’re both here,” Kenma’s mother said before crouching down in front of both boys. “I know Hinata would be here if he could,” She continued. 

“Actually, I’m right here,” the redhead stated as he walked up behind the three. 

“I thought you had a game?” Akaashi questioned. 

“This is more important. Besides, I want to see Kenma! We have so much we need to say, to do! I’ll be here when he wakes up!” Though Kenma was currently opened up on a table, Hinata kept his same cheery attitude. His positivity was exactly what they needed right now. 

Kenma’s mother got up and motioned for the three to join her. She embraced all three boys in a tight hug. “Thank you all for being here. It’s nice to know that so many people care for   
Kenma,” tears formed in her eyes as she pulled them closer. “I know he loves you all in his own way,” it was then that Lev approached. 

“How is he?” Lev asked as he walked closer to the group. 

“So far no news, you’re welcome to join us in waiting,” Kenma’s mother spoke. 

+++

Hours passed and the group sat with no news. Everyone’s anxiety grew stronger. Kuroo’s eyes were still glued to the string around his finger. This was his only source of comfort. Kenma’s mother had her head rested on her husband's shoulder, her eyes closed. Kuroo was unsure if she was asleep or trying to sleep. Bokuto held a firm arm around Akaashi. Hinata sat, desperately awaiting a doctor to come out. A look of excitement plastered his face every time he saw a doctor pass. Lev sat silently, playing with his thumbs. 

Kuroo finally moved his eyes from his string to his bracelet. He and Kenma were forever. They had so much to do, they had so much to say, so much more to their relationship. They had dates to go on, they had so many more kisses, they had fights to have, they had to make up after those fights, they had to be intimate, they had to get to know each other so much more, they had to get married and adopt children, have a house, have pets, grow old together. They were going to have their happy ending. 

Kuroo’s eyes went back to the string around his finger. His eyes followed it till there was no more to be seen. His neck ached but he didn’t want to take his eyes off the string, he needed to see it there. He needed to know that Kenma was still there. 

Without a word, Akaashi stood to his feet and walked away, Bokuto on his heels. Everyone felt the weight of the situation, they all knew that Kenma’s chances were slim. Yet, they were all here. Everyone that cared most about Kenma was there. They wanted to be there despite the chance of pain. 

Kuroo kept his eyes on the string. He watched the corner where it shielded his view. He watched as he saw the still bright red colour. Kuroo tightened his grip, holding on as if he could feel Kenma on the other end. 

Akaashi returned, eyes bloodshot, tears running down his cheeks, Bokuto holding him tight. It wasn’t often that Akaashi cried but this was too much for him. The fear everyone felt was overwhelming. 

Kuroo looked at the sting once more, blinking, he thought what he was seeing was impossible. Slowly, from the corner, Kuroo saw the bright red fading, getting closer and closer, he felt tears build in his eyes. The fading slowly approached, his heart slowly sank, his breathing increased. No, this couldn’t be happening. Kuroo tried to back up in his chair, trying to get as far away as possible from the fading. He wasn’t ready. 

As the fading came closer, wrapping around his finger where the bright red string once was, a ghost feeling remained. Kuroo knew that no matter what, this feeling would haunt him for the rest of his life. As this happened, Kuroo broke down into sobs. He knew that Kenma was no longer alive on the other end. The once red string was now a dark gray colour. 

Kuroo, now on his knees, was unable to speak, only sobs escaped his mouth. Tears ran down his face as he left a piece of himself tear away. Kenma was gone. Kenma was gone. No it couldn’t be that. Despite his inner protests, Kuroo knew that Kenma was dead. 

Kenma’s mother awoke, her eyes filled with worry. Bokuto lunged forward, wrapping his arms around Kuroo. 

“Kenma…” Kuroo sobbed into Bokuto’s shoulder. 

“What’s the matter Kuroo?” Kenma’s mother asked. 

Kuroo was unable to answer. He hated that he’d found out like this. It was wrong. His heart ached. There was so much he wanted to do with Kenma. This was supposed to help Kenma. This was supposed to give them a happy ending. 

Slowly, a doctor walked towards the group. A grim expression on his face. “I’m so sorry… we tried everything we could but the cancer infected more than we knew...Kenma’s heart failed during the operation…” 

Kuroo let out another loud sob, his heart breaking just a bit more. Kuroo heard Mr and Mrs. Kozume breaking down in the corner. He looked over to see Hinata’s once bright expression twisted into a depressing look. Bokuto wrapped his arms around both Kuroo and Akaashi. 

Kuroo was reminded of the sorrow he felt as a child. His chest ached, his body shook like a leaf. This wasn’t right, he felt sick. He clung to Bokuto in hopes of feeling some sort of comfort but he needed Kenma right now the only problem was that Kenma wasn’t there. Kenma was gone.


	13. Chapter 13

Sixty years later

Kuroo laid in his bed, his body ached, his mind lost. Kuroo’s hand trembled as he reached up, his eyes looking at the gray string but then at the faded red and black bracelet around his wrist. He hadn’t taken it off since Kenma’s passing. Kenma was buried with his own. 

The comfort Kuroo once felt looking at the string around his finger had been replaced by sorrow. Now, that string reminded him of where Kenma was buried. Since Kenma’s passing, Kuroo closed himself off and refused to speak of soulmates. His nieces and nephews had asked, his sisters tried but he refused. Kuroo hadn’t loved since Kenma. He didn’t believe anyone was good enough the way Kenma was. 

Kuroo watched the window, he remembered the first time he’d met Kenma. It was like a slap in the face. He thought he was perfect. He’d never felt happier in his life. The only thing that topped that was when he first kissed Kenma. 

He smiled to himself as he remembered the feeling as if it were happening. Kuroo allowed himself to slip away, his final breaths making way as his eyes gently closed. He hoped that in the next life he’d meet Kenma sooner, much sooner.


End file.
